Are you lacking confidence in yourself? Is your fear of failure the cause of lost opportunities again and again? I know exactly how that feels. Lack of confidence can make for a terrible travel partner. It paralyses you. It makes you not even try to fight for what you want, and it ends up locking you in a very small comfort zone.
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I’m Anand Mishra Director, and while in a dark period of my life I also felt that way, and I avoided any situation in which I thought I could fail.
Luckily, I left all that in the past. Let me tell you what were the keys to my transformation that allowed me to become the self-confident person I am today.
1- Stop chasing confidence:
Our self-confidence levels always fluctuate. The same person could feel very confident about herself after finding the job of her dreams, and totally depressed if she was fired. And that’s normal. Nobody can escape this.
So don’t try to learn how to be confident about yourself 100% of the time. It has been scientifically proven that the more you chase that feeling, the more insecure and sad you’ll feel. Accept that you will have hard times like everyone else. Accepting it will make suffering a less powerful force than if you rebel against it.
2- Start little by little:
Two renowned psychologists, Peterson and Brendan, discovered something very curious in their patients: that self-esteem wasn’t a function of the RESULTS of their acts. When one of them didn’t show up for an exam he had been studying hard for, he felt a lot worse than if he had actually tried and got a bad grade.
In other words, the feeling of self-pride for actually trying eclipsed the disappointment of failing the exam.
Remember, acts themselves are a source of confidence, no matter how small of a first step they are.